When to know if you're seeking spirituality for the right reasons

The deeper I dive into my own healing, how people heal, ways to heal, and the healing world, the more I find that a lot of people on a spiritual or healing path are in it for the wrong reasons.

To manifest something, like money or a partner.

To use it as a shiny frame around their life (ahem, social media). 

To deny or run from something. 

Spirituality then becomes about your ego's mission, not sharing more love with the world.

I am not immune to these tendencies. But I have recently become more self-aware of them. And now I want to challenge them. 

So here is She Enlightened's first ever (!!) writing exercise:

1.) Why do I speak spiritual knowledge or enlightenment? Do I want to grow, change something, or run from something?

2). Which spiritual figures do I follow, and what qualities do they have that cause me to follow them?

3). How do I share my spiritual message with the world? Does it feel authentic?

I hope this exercise serves you. 




Passive Resistance is Not New

I hold the belief system that we have no original thoughts.

How could we? Everything that we do and say is informed by our experiences, quotes that we've read, pop culture we've seen, the language(s) we've learned, peer pressure. We take that aggregation and we recycle it. That is why our environment becomes the foundation to what we believe in.

The idea of passive resistance that I suggest we take on in our current political and social atmosphere is not new.

Rosa Parks has been named the "Mother of the Civil Rights Movement." And it only took one word - "no." 

By continuing to sit in a seat where others didn't want her, without yelling, or explaining why she deserved that seat, or punching the bus driver, she engaged in an act of passive resistance, which Martin Luther King used to launch the Montgomery bus boycott in 1955-1956. 

Gandhi. John Lennon and Yoko Ono. Nelson Mandela.

These are the nonviolent practitioners we can look up to.

We don't take into account that resistance can be quiet. It can be nonviolent.

The anger of oppression is always justified, but we can use it to fuel us, not use it against each other.

We can call our Congress people and talk to them as though they wouldn't know any better.

We can protest peacefully.

We can boycott corporations that refuse to serve the LGBTQ population.

Maybe it could keep us going a little longer.

Maybe we won't feel as burned out, fighting with our anger.

It has also been concluded that nonviolent movements were twice as likely to succeed than violent movements (Chenoweth and Stephan). As Tony Robbins says, all lasting change happens in an altered state. 

Maybe we can make real, lasting change.

So do it. Google successful nonviolent action and see what inspires you.

Then go inward.

It could motivate your next project on your fight for peace. 

Why Fully Healing is a Myth

I'm going out on a limb with this title.

I mean...I'm a healer, and here I am, claiming it's all a ruse.

But here's where I see the distinction:

I don't think healing is a myth. I think being healed is a myth.

And it's because of one quote:

"healing is a spiral, not a straight line."

- Erin Telford

Have you ever been in a really great place, thinking that your troubles were over, your triggers were behind you, that because of the knowledge and wisdom you gained due to an experience, you had nothing more to learn when it comes to that experience, and you're on top of the world, ready to preach your enlightened guru sunny demeanor to everyone?

Humans have an unbelievable hope that one day they will arrive at a place where nothing hurts and everything goes well for the rest of forever. 

And then you're suddenly being torn apart by a similar (or the same!) experience. 

This is because we are meant to grow through healing. Healing isn't meant to resolve our issues (although this is a great side effect); healing is a forever process to commit to. 

Healing is meant to expose to us what become our deepest lessons - and our deepest lessons, like anything else that's memorable or important to us, are themes that keep showing up in our lives.

This is why I'm skeptical of total forgiveness, enlightenment, happiness, and stability. I'm skeptical of those who seek something or someone to solve all of their problems. I'm skeptical of those who believe that because they have moved away from an experience, that experience has not informed their story.

Always reframe a "setback" as a "growth spurt." That's exactly what it is. 

You may be "in that place again." That place may look exactly the same.

Remember that you, however, are not.