Growing up, I was the queen of grudges. I felt like I was in control, morally right, and the better person if I dragged out my anger against another person. In it’s own twisted way, it felt good to have a perception of power.
By studying A Course in Miracles, I discovered these habits had become unhealthy cycles of grudges, guilt, and judgment that breed just that, and only that. A lot of my past romantic relationships and friendships ended in a heat of blame. My self-esteem would chip away. I was ready for those cycles to end.
An A Course in Miracles mantra is, “Forgiveness is the key to happiness.” Through the text’s exercises, I began to learn how wonderful it was to release my resentments and grow in deeper love with everyone that I loved.
The course teaches that when you are attacking another person, you are actually attacking yourself. A daily practice of acknowledging another’s behavior and choosing to see them with love instead of attack has not only given me compassion for others, but more compassion and willingness to forgive my very self…which is more of what EVERYONE needs.
When I find ways to forgive and take care of myself, my anxiety and tension tend to slip away. I give myself permission to realize that I am doing my very best, and that my best is beautiful.
FeMeditate: Practice Forgiveness
1). Become a witness to your judgments and resentment against others, no matter who they are. Committing to this alone for a full day will help you understand where you need to practice forgiveness.
2). Realize that there is a better way to think – with love. Anyone who desires compassion can call upon it easily. This is a simple choice. Recognize that you want to feel differently.
3). Be Still. Oftentimes these negative feelings are a sign that we aren’t in tune with a general place of peace. Sitting in stillness, meditating, or doing yoga are the best ways to let love and happiness come forward in a natural way.